How to handle dating someone in the military

This is based solely on the experiences of my veteran friends, as well as my own with a past paramour. The military teaches service members to trust their unit, and few others. If he comes to you with a problem, chances are he’ll talk about it until he no longer wants to and then go into lockdown. That is not a good thing or a bad thing, that is just a matter of fact and something you need to understand. Military men are used to their band of brothers, and are bred to be loyal and protective. Some branches of the military (I’m looking at you, Marines) have a feeling of superiority over others.

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The doubts were frustrating: does it make sense to even attempt dating someone states away?

Researching this post, I found much of the advice for military girlfriends discouraging. It made me think back to my days as a military girlfriend and how small the military community made me feel at times. I was a young professional with a career and my own money.

It hurt most at the time because my service member and I had been together for years. In the civilian community, people wouldn’t dream of constantly reminding you of “your place.”.

Although there are many benefits to being in the military, it comes with many sacrifices and it isn’t for everyone.

It’s for reasons like this I’d never considered dating someone in the military, but then I did.

Expect sleepless nights, and bouts of being on the receiving end of awkward silences. You need to try your hardest to understand, get him to eventually talk about it (preferably to a professional) and pretty much avoid all triggers — like war movies. You will be inundated with more random facts about places like the Middle East or the South than you care to cram into your brain. I won a round of trivia just because I knew the currency in Bahrain. I am a sucker for someone who is passionate about his work. They are modern day heroes; if that’s not something to be proud of, I’m not quite sure what is! Basically, dating a Generation Y military man is no different than dating anyone else. His may be unimaginable to you, but that does not make him any better or worse.

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